To know me is to know my love for sneakers.

They’ve been a major part of my style since I can remember. They bring me joy and play a major part in my style. I like what I like but they are all MY style.

I’m sure you’re thinking, what does this have to do with personal body image? 

Well, let me explain.

Pre-cancer, I was a figure competitor (bodybuilder) so my relationship with my body was to train it and train it hard to look stage ready to win shows.

The whole sport is based on the “LOOK” of my body, nothing else.

I mean you train for months and months to get on stage and have other flawed humans tell you if your body is “good enough” to “WIN.” That can really mess with a person’s perception of their own body and that’s what happened to me. It’s what happens to many people in the sport, most don’t realize it until they are out of it. Needless to say, I know what it’s like to have negative thoughts about my body.

After surviving a lumpectomy, six rounds of chemo, 33 rounds of radiation, and five years of hormone therapy, I would be doing myself a disservice to do anything but LOVE it for fighting for me.

I’d been hard enough on my physical body through bodybuilding. I’d be lying if I said there aren’t days I want to change things here and there. I’m human and that’s what we do, but every time it happens I switch my thoughts and feelings like I switch my shoes.

I like to think of my feelings like my footwear style.

I have a variety of different styles (feelings) so it depends on the day what I feel like rocking but either way, I love them all because they are all mine, and I CHOSE them!

I have styles that are low key and then styles that are eye-catchers. I’ve realized that my feelings about my body are the same way. I get to CHOOSE on a daily basis how I view (and love) my post-cancer body. 

My breasts were both the same size before my lumpectomy and radiation. Now my left is drastically different from my right.

I probably should get a prosthetic but I’m rocking what I got!

It used to really bother me but I shifted those feelings to gratefulness, at least I still have them. There are many women who’ve graced this journey that had to make the hard decision to remove one or even both of their breasts so I’ll remain grateful.

I absolutely love my body, even with the changes from breast cancer. 

I’m grateful that I get to choose my feelings like I choose dope kicks.

Choosing positivity has helped me to grow, evolve, and love my body even more no matter what happens along this journey.

It’s also helped me to help other women not be ashamed of what their post-cancer bodies look like.

My body is mine, uniquely and intentionally made by God, love is what I’ll continue to nurture it with.